Let me start by saying that India was biggest step of my life so far. Throughout my 25 years I have struggled to grab hold of the reins of my life and take that step into being who I want to be. India, for the most part, was all about this.

My expectations for India (while I tried to be a proper yogi and have none) was to find some kind of resolution to my questions about the self, to have an amazing experience, and to do a whole lot of yoga. Ultimately what I was left with was an overload of (incredible) information, a real view of how the world works, and yes, a whole lot of yoga.

Upon arriving to Delhi from my 12-hour flight from Australia, the first thing that struck me was the pure kindness of India and her people. Having never been to India before, I got lost in the Airport numerous times and was greeted by friendly faces at every turn. An overnight layover in an unknown airport might have scared me, but I felt instantly safe, even being greeted by an Indian fellow with a (sealed) bottle of water for me. It was a good start for India.

The fire ceremony on the first day of my 300hr Yoga Teacher Training at Gyan Yog Breath

After my very delayed flight from Delhi to Dehradun (Air India’s only downfall), I was picked up by my yoga school and taken to Gyan Yog Breath ashram, my private room and my much-needed shower. Having been awake for nearly 28 hours straight, I was beyond ready to stop. Having a private room for the 27 days I was at the ashram was without a doubt the best decision I had made, and if you plan on doing an extended training, I highly recommend it. The ability to come back to an empty room after 12 hours of training with 26 people is a godsend. Pay the extra money – I promise you won’t regret it.

The training was intense and the first few days really took their toll. The first day started at 5am and ended at 8pm – it will remain one of the longest, yet most incredible days of my life. The 5am start was met with a traditional fire ceremony, followed by pranayama, asana, alignment, philosophy, karma yoga, asana (again!) and emotional blockage treatment training. As the weeks went on, parts of the schedule were replaced with anatomy, meditation, teaching methodology, study breaks and teaching classes. The intensity didn’t budge.

The teachers of the school were all informative, kind, and incredibly knowledgeable. The mix was balanced between modern and traditional. The asana classes were difficult and got more difficult as the training went on. In particular the afternoon asana meant longer holds, more aligned assists (and very traditional assists at that) and more intense postures. Thought out it all I had no doubt the teachers knew what they were doing, knew what they were teaching or had our wellbeing at heart.

As the classes went on, my muscles grew, and then got more fatigued. During our second-last and final weeks, most of the classes we were doing were taught by the other students, and slowly we became less capable to practice them. While some of us were legs-behind-neck flexible, most of us can’t even squat with our knees together. Each pose was such a challenge and our bodies suffered. My mentality for “try everything once” lessened during the last week for fear of breaking my shoulders, elbows or lumbar spine. It was an important lesson in knowing the limits of your body.

When told “you look so sad” as I smiled through my tears I may have smiled excessively to overcome it

The highlight of my training was unexpectedly the karma yoga hour for the first nine days. During this time, we were required to do something to give back to the community – whether it be to paint the walls of the shala in pretty designs, clean our rooms to pristine quality, pick up rubbish along the River Ganga or teach local school children about our culture. The karma yoga hour gave us insight into the Indian culture, into why we’d chosen India to do our training and open our eyes to the world around us – that yoga does change lives and is so much more than just asana.

The experience had so many highs and lows – as I said to many of the others doing the training, one minute I would feel like I was on top of the world, and the next that I know nothing and the world is on top of me.

At the graduation, I cried when my certificate hit my hands. Something I had planned to do over 18 months ago had finally come, and I was proud to have stuck to my goal and complete it with such passion. I felt more competent as a teacher and was blessed to do something that I not only love, but something that has the capacity to affect so many people. I was passionate about the practice, but still so unsure of myself and the self-discovery I had come to do.

After staying one day longer at the Ashram to rest, I was picked up by my next host (and teacher) from Anantadrishti Yoga. After (unexpectedly) pilling all of my belongings and myself onto the back of his scooter, we drove to Tapovan though the mountains – not a word being muttered between us.

Upon reflection this motorbike ride was the critical point where my perspective started to shift. As a child, could I have imagined myself and many bags and yoga mats hanging off the back of a scooter riding through India? No, probably not. A sense of pride started to overcome me in that moment and has continued until this day.

This retreat had forced me to face a number of new challenges, all within myself. From showering in cold buckets most of the time in dusty rooms, to riding on the back of a scooter up and down mountains nearly daily. From learning about mantras and philosophy from possibly the most knowledgeable man I have ever met, to struggling my way through pranayama and meditation techniques. I was challenged more through that three weeks than I had been ever before.

The first of my tribulations came from practicing pranayama. I would work my way through the exercises and feel like my chest was about to explode from anxiety. After each session balling my eyes out because I had found it so difficult. My teacher wasn’t sure what the issue was, and I wasn’t sure how to explain, so the first week was us both fumbling around to realise that my anxiety was holding me back too much to participate fully. What was meant to be a 6am – 9pm schedule of pranayama and meditation, the schedule was changed dramatically for me, focussing on theory over practical. I got sick during the last week, so there were days we didn’t study even at all. My body and my mind had learned so much about what I was capable of, what I wanted and did not want.

I was told later that of the thousands of other students my teacher had taught, I was the first to break down so completely due to the practice and that I too had challenged him. The experience was life changing for both of us, which was something pure within itself.

Laxman Jhula bridge at night in Rishikesh

On my second last night, I was taken to a hotel in the top of the mountains. Upon arriving, it was no more than a man’s house we had arrived at, with extra mattresses in a room we would all share. Myself and my teacher were the only ones who spoke English, so I kept to myself and journaled after watching the sun go down over Rishikesh. Journaling this long in front of a fire in someone’s home brings you to clarity, and I was able to work out what I was doing. It really is true that you grow the most when you are out of your comfort zone.

While I am by no means at the end of this personal growth journey, I feel I have the tools now to face it head on. I am sure of parts of my life that I love, that I want and that I focus on heavily. One of the biggest things I learned from the retreat was to only do what you want to do, and to only do what will make you happy. Many times during my day do I stop, and ask myself if this is really what I want and where I believe happiness will arise – for it is not the action that it will arise from but myself. Parts of my life are very different, my motivation more intense and my mind and body more inspired. Little things like chanting the Gayatri Mantra while I unpack the dishwasher, to bigger things like taking the step to educate others in what I have learned myself – I believe I am a very different person to who began.

So, as a takeaway from this post – I urge you to 1. Believe people who have been to India when they say “everyone’s experience is so different” because it truly is. Nothing is for everyone, and everyone’s experience is their own. If you can love India what it is, then your experience will be grand. And 2. Practice what you preach. Something which was said to me so many times is that yoga is the practice and everything in life is yoga. If you want to truly benefit from the practices of yoga, incorporate it into everything. Love it and love everything – for your life is what you make it.

Namaste,
Ax

My view from the “hotel” at the top of the mountain. You can see the accomodation on the right!

ALL AROUND RISHIKESH IN 45 DAYS – AN OVERVIEW OF MY INDIAN ADVENTURE